MIT’s Iron Chancellor Melissa Nobles, best known for fanning the flames of racial divisiveness in academia, has a new mission: Standing Together Against Hate (STAH).

“When STAH was announced, we said that antisemitism would be our initial focus.” That initial focus lasted about as long as a conservative white male at an elite college faculty interview.

Chancellor Nobles goes on to explain her new focus:

“Through discussions with many in our community we have come to appreciate that antisemitism and Islamophobia – also on the rise, and often underreported – are best addressed at the same time. In response, MIT will take on both, not lumped together, but with equal energy and in parallel.” (Real quote – the Beaver didn’t make this up.)

As vandals urinate on the windows of the campus Hillel Center with impunity, it’s comforting to know that MIT’s senior administrators are working to stem the rising tide of underreported Islamophobia.

Hate experts at MIT’s Institute Community Equity Office have determined that separate but equal anti-hate initiatives are the best way to Stand Together, everyone segregated in their own safe space. After all, who wants to experience the ickiness of oppressors being “lumped together” with the oppressed? Next thing you know they’ll expect mixed identity groups to take classes with each other or live in the same dorms.

Mission accomplished will be declared as soon as thin-skinned Jews learn to experience the joys of Belonging while classmates and masked outside agitators exercise their free speech rights chanting for their deaths.

We all look forward to the Bias Response Team returning to the ordinary business of persecuting people for the violent act of deadnaming trannies.

Photoshop by the Rambling Raccoon