by onlythebeaverknows | Feb 5, 2022 | Uncategorized
Double-masked jeerers from cadre pods 6 and 7 attended the first use of the new ducking stool at the restroom-recycled water pond behind the Stata Center. Sophomore Joe Brown had previously received two warnings from the Dean of Groupthink, lowering his social credit...
by onlythebeaverknows | Feb 1, 2022 | Uncategorized
MIT Associate Dean of Inquisition today announced the publication of volume 12 of the Index of Forbidden Words. This critical update was painstakingly developed by a diverse and inclusive staff of thirty-seven deans, associate deans, assistant deans, and cunning...
by onlythebeaverknows | Jan 30, 2022 | Uncategorized
Infamous geophysicist Dorian Abbot has been summoned to the next regularly scheduled Struggle Session this Friday at 4pm in Killian Court. The leadership decision to cancel Professor Abbot’s delivery of the formerly prestigious Carlson Lecture, because his...
