Wags of a certain age remember the infamous Golden Fleece Award bestowed each month by Senator William Proxmire upon the public official that squandered the most taxpayer money.

In keeping with the maxim that Mockery is the Best Policy, the Babbling Beaver is pleased to announce the Golden Beaver Award. This coveted and prestigious honor will be irregularly awarded to the Beaver fan whose diligent surfing of MIT’s website uncovers the most egregious policy, program, prohibition, professor, publication, pronouncement, polemic, or pompous pea brain demonstrating the extent to which the woke mind virus has infected our beloved alma mater.

In all due modesty, the Beaver believes it will be tough to top the outing of the Consortium for Graduate Studies in Gender, Culture, Women and Sexuality seminar on the power of Erotic Vomiting to reorganize hegemonic gender formations. But take heart because fresh outrages are being served up every day by legions of DEI apparatchiks, SHASS faculty, and their innumerate fellow-traveler graduate students. Help bear witness as these woke warriors keep MIT’s real scientists and engineers cowering under their desks in fear of their weaponized word salads.

Entries should be submitted to BabblingBeaver@BabblingBeaver.com or anonymously via the Beaver’s Submit Stories page. Don’t forget to include the offending URL along with your preferred pseudonym so the Golden Beaver can be awarded without inviting cancelation.