MIT’s School of Humanities, Arts, and Socialist Scientism (SHASS) launched three major initiatives that will put $3M a year to work to spread the Woke Mind Virus into MIT’s STEM curricula.

The SHASS+ Connectivity Fund
The Humanities Cultivation Fund
The SHASS Education Innovation Fund

Reaction from the STEM professoriate? CLICK HERE, turn on your sound, and sing along.

Woke on Mass Ave.

(Verse 1)
SHASS is stirring, oh what a scene,
Where woke meets tech, in a clash of the keen.
Professors igniting, students take to the street,
Now Mass Ave’s gridlock is MIT’s beat.
Engineering’s scratching their heads with a sigh,
While SHASS is preaching that numbers can lie.

(Pre-Chorus)
STEM is hardcore, building rockets to Mars,
SHASS says, “Wait, let’s discuss social scars!”
MIT’s funding the union, what a pair,
One’s got equations, the other’s got flair!

(Chorus)
Shut down the street, shut down the lab,
SHASS is woke, and they’re waving the flag!
Collab with STEM? Oh, it’s quite the show,
When coding meets culture, who really knows?

(Verse 2)
They say that the science is rooted in fact,
But SHASS says, “Nope, let’s question that track!”
Is gravity biased? Let’s have a debate,
While engineers calculate escape velocity’s fate.
The funding flows and the emails too,
“Let’s integrate woke while we’re splitting atoms in two!”

(Pre-Chorus)
STEM’s in the corner with AI and steel,
SHASS walks in, “But how do you feel?”
Mass Ave’s jammed, the protests blaze,
MIT’s future in a social maze!

(Chorus)
Shut down the street, shut down the lab,
SHASS is woke, and they’re waving the flag!
Collab with STEM? Oh, it’s quite the show,
When coding meets culture, who really knows?

(Bridge)
Hardcore science, meet your soft social twin,
Where algorithms and activism begin!
Who needs circuits when we’ve got signs?
Physics is old, but hey, protest’s divine!

(Chorus)
Shut down the street, shut down the lab,
SHASS is woke, and they’re waving the flag!
Collab with STEM? Oh, it’s quite the show,
When coding meets culture, who really knows?

(Outro)
From Mass Ave to the Infinite Hall,
It’s woke versus STEM, who’ll rise, who’ll fall?
But with funding so thick, one thing is clear—
At MIT, the collab’s the next frontier!

Song lyrics by Bullet. Music by Suno.