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Snowflake poster attack at MIT fights against free speech with free speech

A bizarre attempt by opponents of MIT’s recently adopted Free Expression Statement to demonstrate harm caused by free speech was greeted with confused laughter and derision. “These snowflakes need lessons in both logic and satire,” sighed a straight conservative Christian student who failed to get offended. “Perhaps they should take classes from the Babbling Beaver.”

Twitter exploded with mockery of the irony-impaired “best and brightest” at MIT.

Culture Queen Dean Suzy Nelson responded with a letter to all students offering yet more mental health counseling.

Undergraduate Association president David “Hissy Fit” Spicer took to Instagram to virtue signal his solidarity.

Radical feminist professor and free speech opponent Sally Haslanger applauded the illogic of the postering campaign, reminding everyone that reason and rationality are oppressive tools of the cisheteropatriarchy.

The Beaver invited the whole lot of them to a Random Taunts of Derision session to help them thicken their paper-thin hides.

Free speech opponents were unfazed, threatening to continue giving wet-noodle verbal beatings to anyone who refuses to get offended by their faux hate speech or deny their demands to be censored. “We insist on being silenced!” they defiantly chanted.

1 Comment

  1. Straight Outta Vassar

    Associated with MIT for some time now, I have been attempting to expand my critical consciousness by asking, at almost every juncture, ‘What would Sally Haslanger say?” This strategy greatly simplifies life as absolutely everything is preceded by its cancellation. I rarely rise from my bed.


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