In his last official act before checking in for rehab at College Presidents Anonymous, outgoing president L. Rafael Reif convened an ad hoc task force chartered with recommending a new name for the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.

“In order to expunge the shame of our racist and colonialist past, I have asked Chancellor Melissa Nobles to chair a select group of enlightened DEI experts to choose a more fitting moniker reflective of our strengthened commitment to anti-racist pedagogy, multigender justice, and the restoration of indigenous knowledge.”

Candidate names under consideration include:

The renaming task force is expected to announce its decision before the MIT faculty votes on accepting a Free Speech Statement or when hell freezes over, which appears more likely to happen first.