The mean orange man tossed yet another stink bomb into the woke hornets’ nest. His latest Executive Order dares to Make Insane Asylums Great Again (MIAGA).

“Shifting homeless individuals into long-term institutional settings for humane treatment through the appropriate use of civil commitment will restore public order.  Surrendering our cities and citizens to disorder and fear is neither compassionate to the homeless nor other citizens.  My Administration will take a new approach focused on protecting public safety.”

“This abuse of executive power must cease!” shouted Dr. Canis Rabidus, wiping foam from his lips. Harvard’s popular Dean of Neurodivergent Equity explained the potential long term impact. “After Harvard inevitably caves like Columbia, academics like me could end up sharing padded cells with those psychotic, smelly, dangerous, HIV infected, violent lunatics. Not that there’s anything wrong with them.”

There were a record 274,224 schizophrenics, junkies, winos, bums, hobos, pickpockets, drifters, zombies, shoplifters, street poopers, and other assorted vagrants living on the streets at the end of the Biden administration. If this Executive Order survives attack by the usual cabal of rogue judges, the sacred cow status of the country’s homeless population will be rescinded.

“We warned the America people that once authorities were allowed to enforce the law and deport illegal migrants, they might try to make progressive cities livable again,” the editorial board of the New York Times fulminated.  “The nation’s eyes are on our Ivy League professors. We implore them to use their giant brains, impeccable reputations, and oratorical skills to end this ableist tyranny.”