A recent conference at MIT proved that irony is dead, tone-deafness knows no bounds, and even a pirate beaver can’t compose fake news as absurd as reality.

Francis Collins, Covid misinformation and censorship majordomo, took center stage at the Building Trust in Science Through Conversation and Empathy conference to praise the “success” of vaccines that fail to prevent infection or stop transmission. Rushed to market in desperate fear of a gain-of-function engineered virus that escaped from a shoddy Chinese lab. An embarrassment that Collins and his co-conspirators continue to gaslight the public about, insisting that the virus leapt from bats to humans unassisted despite the smoking-gun fingerprints of genetic manipulation.

The root cause of the global Covid catastrophe was not reckless high-risk virus research, mismanagement, politicization of science, and panic. Perish the thought! It was poor messaging.

The lesson to be learned is that “the government should have had a better plan for communicating information to the public.”

Better at ruthlessly trying to silence Stanford scientist Jay Bhattacharya? Who is now the NIH director? That Collins personally demonized as a “fringe epidemiologist?” For daring to tell the truth about the infection-fatality rate, the role of herd immunity, the need to provide focused protection for the most vulnerable, and the danger and fruitlessness of closing schools and shutting down the economy? As Collins recommended?

Yup. A Goebbels & Himmler communications plan surely would have been more effective shutting Jay up.

But wait, there’s more.

Climate scientists must also regain trust, as their reputations collapse faster than Columbia University’s. Wait, wait, I know. Let’s call in a third-world journalist whose story-telling abilities are her favorite tool for quashing public skepticism of Experts™.

Her secret? Sudanese climate journalist and keynote speaker Lina Yassin explained that “when she reframed her messaging <about global warming hysteria> to incorporate the teachings of Islam, people were much more receptive.”

Allahu Akbar, there is but one Science and it is Fauci!

Nobody would believe the Beaver if he wove a tale that this actually happened at the world’s leading STEM university. With the full cooperation and participation of Provost Cynthia Barnhart and former Faculty Chair and Professor of Political Science Lilly Tsai. Key leaders in an administration desperately trying to get Jay Bhattacharya at the NIH to give them more “overhead” money. To support the kind of administrators that put on this conference.

Story suggested by Advocatus