Poor Karl Reid, MIT’s recently hired Vice President of Equity & Inclusion. Everywhere he goes, and everyone he meets, is another reminder of the systemic racism that keeps good men like him down.

A tall black man can’t even get on an airplane wearing a college sports zip-up without some cracker mistaking him for a basketball coach. Can you imagine the seething racial animosity that must possess such a bigot’s soul?

Karl is an engineer, gosh dern it. OK, he used to be an engineer. Now he’s a social engineer, which is practically the same thing. Given the collegiate DEI hiring boom, his airplane seatmate should have guessed he was a diversity professional.

At least this Jim Crow incident provided our highly paid moral educator with a teachable moment. And not just chastising some redneck making incorrect Bayesian inferences. The painful story had to be posted on Twitter to underscore the importance of hiring more Vice Presidents of Equity & Inclusion to stamp out all the wrong-think in the world.

So what if this heart-wrenching drama bears an uncanny resemblance to an airplane anecdote shared by an offended scientist, tearfully related in Nature’s special issue on science’s toxic legacy. Lived-experience narratives of unconscious bias and marginalization require constant amplification to make sure everyone knows their place in the oppressed/oppressor hierarchy.

Ratioing Karl on Twitter over this teapot tempest is a striking example of a world in dire need of yet more Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion indoctrination. Soldier on, stalwart fellow. Soldier on.

Story suggested by the Burbling Bieber.