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“Woke Tim” photoshop contest

MIT Mascot TIM Beaver

The Babbling Beaver is pleased to announce the “Woke TIM” photoshop contest, your chance to show off your pirate chops as a techno-wizard of visual mockery.

MIT’s beaver mascot, engineer of the animal kingdom, was adopted 100 years ago as a dignified and industrious symbol befitting MIT’s manly culture. It has been proudly displayed by generations of alumni on the distinctive school ring affectionately known as the brass rat. Only survivors of the Paris Island of engineering education have the right to flash their Beaver.

Progressive feminization turned our noble mascot first into the costumed clown shown above and then into the infantilized abomination known as “Wide Tim.” Wide Tim is used by MIT’s admissions office to promote a kinder, gentler image in order to advance its gender-biased admissions policy.

It’s time to drive the symbolism to the max and depict the woke zeitgeist currently infecting the world’s leading STEM university. Our editors challenge you to design and submit the best drag queen, comsymp, LGBTQ, purple-haired, pierced, tattooed trans-beaver your fevered brain can render!

Entries must be submitted by email to before the start of the fall semester. Finalists will have their work displayed in a Babbling Beaver fall fashion showdown, the winner to be chosen by public acclamation. Your pseudonymity will be respected.

First prize is three hearty Aarghs! and eternal fame in the hearts of those who cherish a unique heritage slowly being ground to postmodern dust.

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