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MIT to sell School of Humanities, Arts, and Socialist Scientism (SHASS) to Harvard

MIT reached agreement last night to sell its problematic School of Humanities, Arts, and Socialist Scientism (SHASS) to Harvard for $1, retaining only its award-winning Department of Economics.

“We did a careful cost/benefit analysis,” explained MIT’s Chief Financial Officer. “Four hundred million dollars a year of ‘overhead’ was being siphoned off research grants awarded to top scientists at MIT’s Schools of Science and Engineering to fund money-losing operations like Women’s & Gender Studies, Latinx Grievances, Marxist Linguistics, and the Anthropology of Queerness. This represents a grave threat to MIT’s $27 billion endowment.”

Once the acquisition closes, MIT undergraduates will be able to fulfill their dreaded humanities requirements by taking exchange courses up-river at the Kremlin on the Charles. Additional savings will be realized when SHASS takes its two hundred thirty-seven DEI deans, assistant deans, deputy deans, associate deans, and support staffs with them.

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