In a shocking act of defiance, the American Geophysical Union (AGU) has decided to host a session titled “Resisting wokecraft, fighting the DEI credo and rescuing science” at its fall 2022 meeting. The session will feature experiences from cancelled, censored, and bullied faculty members the world over, as well as theoretical and practical ways to keep scientific inquiry alive, rekindling the desire for exploration and the excitement of discovery.

MIT’s chancellor Melissa Nobles immediately denounced the apostates, calling for an investigation and deplatforming of the entire AGU program committee. “The enterprise of science has been – and remains – complicit in systemic racism. We must encourage debate and seek solutions-based approaches that propose ways to restore truth, repair trust, and seek justice. This requires silencing anyone who disagrees with us as well as punishing DEI refuseniks who resist privileging BIPOC identities and their new ways of knowledge informed by lived experience.”

The media eagerly looks forward to covering the upcoming auto-da-fé.

Story submitted by Lodovico Volponi